Two years ago today...

21st May, 2008

I don't even know what this day was yet - haven't checked the trusty nokia diary - but I feel like writing so writing has begun...

This day two years ago saw the end of my two weeks traveling Spain with a beautiful friend of mine from back home. We were in Barcelona, which he would make his base for the subsequent summer, and I would fly off to here n there as my gypsy summer continued.

Thing is with this boy, though I love him so incredibly much it's with with nothing but love that I say it - he's difficult. OK OK I don't help things, but he is.

And isn't it funny how the end of something is so often the most difficult time?! Even something as lovely as this lil jaunt together had been. So often it's the closing moments of something that brings emotion and vulnerability to the surface - where it firmly overtakes anything like logic or sanity ;-)

I've been thinking lately - as in over these last days - how the humdrum of daily life masks the impact of existential crises that travel brings up. The good ones, the bad ones... though this day two years ago wasn't that, and oddly this day today might be - so it seems I've just contradicted myself... Anyhow, moving on. Or back. Ahh whatever...

So two years ago today I was wandering the streets of Barcelona, essentially avoiding my beautiful but moody friend because the ending of our trip had brought us to the edge of our nerves for each other.

Instead I played with a spunky lil Argentinian pocket-rocket named Cici - we escaped the hostel for a lil piazza (Italian I know, but how I call them) and talked girly talk like body image and boys. It was awesome. It was an antidote to two weeks of boy time where he and i had both probably felt almost everything, but said absolutely nothing ;-)

Cici gave me a parting gift - a little anklet with bells on, that were legend to be the sound of tiny guardian angels to take care of me. I wore it for a long time after and still have it.

THIS is the stuff that matters.. these moments in piazzas with distant friends who invest in you the kind of faith you just need to hear every now and then. THESE are the times we should all remember and focus on - these tiny lil innocuous moments with the smell of a foreign city in your lungs and strange singing accents in your ears. THAT is the stuff I am focusing on today - as in this day right here.. it isn't much, but it helps :-)